On the Subject of Connect Four

On every single box the people playing are f*ckin’  idiots...

As the title suggests, you must get 4 black chips in a row (vertically, horizontally, or diagonally) to solve the module. By default, there will already be a single red chip on the board.

Use the previously placed chip and the table below to determine where to place your next chip. If you place your chip in an incorrect column, a strike will be recorded. Columns are numbered from left to right, starting from zero.

Prev. Column: If the last digit of the Serial Number is odd... If the last digit of the Serial Number is even...
0 Place your chip in the column number of placed black chips modulo 7. Place your chip in the column number of placed red chips modulo 7.
1 Place your chip in the column number of the first digit of the Serial Number modulo 7. Place your chip in the column number of the second digit of the Serial Number modulo 7.
2 Place your chip in the column number of the amount of AA batteries modulo 7. Place your chip in the column number of the amount of D batteries modulo 7.
3 Place your chip in the column number of the amount of digits in the Serial Number. Place your chip in the column number of the amount of letters in the Serial Number.
4 Place your chip in the column number of the amount of letters in first digit in the Serial Number. Place your chip in the column number of the amount of letters in second digit in the Serial Number.
5 Place your chip in the column where you previously placed it. Place your chip in the column where your opponent previously placed it.
6 Place your chip in the column number of placed chips modulo 7. Place your chip in the column number of empty positions modulo 7.