On the Subject of Impossible Modules

What do you mean we didn’t use both themes? You’re in a spaceship, and you’re changing the observed frequency of light! That’s “space” and “/time”! I’d argue that’s all the use we could get. Not using the / would be like leaving the bone in a chicken wing. Not efficient. This mod is 100% eat, baby.

The year is 2555. The repository now consists mostly of extreme modules, with a sort of arms race between mod creators and solvers to create and solve the most difficult modules imaginable. A few years ago, the last of the millennium problems was solved after being the twelfth step in Cruel Evil Rotating Not Word Search. The solvers had been winning. That was, until last year.

It was so simple. Everyone had been so focused on making their solving process as difficult as possible, that no one had thought to take a step back and remove the solving process entirely. A new difficulty, impossible, was added to the repo, and that was it. The modders had won.

On the Subject of Logical Conclusions

Parry this you filthy casual.

This module strikes when interacted with.

On the Subject of Making the Impossible Possible

500 years later, and the Challenge Bomb Site still accepts logless videos as proofs for solves.

You knew it was theorhetically possible for light to be perceived differently at high speeds. The Doppler Effect or something. Surely this is possible, right? The math checks out, and the technology is there. If you can travel toward a striking module at about 25 percent of the speed of light and snap a picture of it, the status light will appear green. All that’s left is to try it.

Unfortunately, you do not possess a ship able to go exactly that speed, so you’ll have to ask for help. Luckily, you’re pretty sure your friend Blananas9 also has a ship that can go speeds that high. Using the model of your and your friend’s ships, determine what gear to put it in to be able to move towards their ship at a relative speed of 25 percent of the speed of light, or 0.25c. When you decide on a speed, Blananas9 will determine the correct speed and direction to go in based on the speeds available to them. For example, if you can go 0.05c and Blananas9 can go 0.30c, setting your speed to 0.05c will let them know to travel at 0.30c towards you while you travel 0.05c in the opposite direction. If they cannot reciprocate with any of their possible speeds, however, the status light will not appear the correct color, leaving you with a strangely colored striking module and 3,000 bitcoins down on rocket fuel.

To determine what ship Blananas9 is using, take the model you see on your dashboard and shift down the list by the first speed of your model (in percentage of c) multiplied by the number of battery holders + 1, wrapping around if necessary. Some models have variable speeds, of which are compiled below from their usage manuals. P.S. Blananas9 won’t know what to do if you leave your vehicle in park. How were they supposed to know you started?

Toyota Camry XXXXXLE	0.05c	0.09c	0.15c	Α	0.20c	0.26c
GregTech Xz30	0.03c	0.06c	Β	0.19c	0.21c	0.34c
Tesla Model 零	0.04c	Γ	0.09c	0.12c	0.26c	0.33c
Literally Just Two Boeing 747s Strapped To Each Other™	0.01c	0.02c	0.07c	0.22c	Δ	0.51c
Lamborghini Overcompensator	0.07c	0.16c	0.23c	0.31c	0.48c	Ε
Apollo 73	0.11c	0.13c	0.17c	Ζ	0.49c	0.73c
1991 Honda Civic (slightly modified)	0.00c	Η	0.10c	0.15c	0.30c	0.40c
Starship Velociraptor	0.08c	0.11c	Θ	0.22c	0.27c	0.28c
JPL Experimental beta 0.1.3	0.01c	0.02c	0.04c	0.08c	0.16c	0.32c
Kerbal Mk. 2 vFinal Revision 3	0.04c	0.10c	0.11c	0.35c	0.14c	0.00c

Α: Add the digits of the current year.*
Β: The bomb’s voltage. If the bomb does not have a voltage, this speed is broken.
Γ: 4 plus the number of batteries on the bomb.
Δ: 22 plus the number of port plates with more than one port on them.
Ε: 99 minus the other model’s top speed. If the other model is also an overcompensator, this is c.**
Ζ: The length of the other model’s name.
Η: 3 times the number of lit indicators.
Θ: 10 plus the digital root of serial number digits.

*The year is 2555. I’d understand the confusion, I’m still writing 2554 on everything too.
**It never actually reaches the speed of light, but they approach it when racing each other at top speed.